Pick Up Lines
by DragonAge2FanGurl
Summary: Sharon failed at making Alice realize she was a helpless maiden... so she wants her to realize at least she is a girl... so she has Break, Oz and Gil tell her pickup lines... M for a reason.
1. Chapter 1

"Alright last time my plan to make Alice realize she was a maiden, didn't work," Sharon told Break, Gil, and Oz.

"So?" Gil asked.

'So this time… just use a pick up line," Sharon finished.

'What if they're perverted" Gil asked.

Sharon explained sex and such quickly to Alice.

"You start Break," Sharon whispered pushing him forward.

"Alice Kun," Break started, "This is a Condom," he said holding up a condom, "If we put it on, we can have sex."

"You damn Clown get out or I'll FUCKING KILL YOU!"

Break backed away.

The next day

"Alice," Oz started, "You're like a musical instrument. When I play with you, you ,make sounds."

"YOU MOTHER FUCKER GO DIE IN A FUCKING DUSTY HOLE!" Alice screamed.

Another fail.

The next day.

"Raven.. You are, are only hope," Sharon cried pushing Gil forward.

"Stupid Rabbit," Gil started, "You've been a bad girl. Go to my room!"

"Are you hitting on me?" Alice asked.

"Maybe.." Gil growled seductively.

"Fine meet me in your room," Alice purred.

Alice walked away as Sharon concluded, "Well Raven did a good job."


	2. Chapter 2

My sister helped me with the sex scene so if you don't like it direct the hate comments at her

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Gil walked into his room to see that Alice was laying on his bed, looking very impatient. As he walked in Alice sat up and smirked at him. She was scared, she still didn't really understand what sex was. But she knew it was going to happen.

"Seaweed head, what exactly is this SEX thing?" Alice asked

"I guess I can explain it to you Stupid Rabbit" Gil said in a small voice "Well this is embarrassing (for the author and Gil). Um were to start…. Okay do you know what the sex organ is called on a man?" As he was saying this he was praying she did.

"Huh? What is a sex organ?" Alice asked cocking her head to the side.

"*sigh* Do you know what a penis is?"

"Is that something I can eat?"

"well in a way yes but you can NOT chomp on it like a piece of meat."

"*che* Then what's the point?" Alice asked turning away

While turning bright red Gil said "If you 'eat it you are really sucking on and licking it. It gives the guy pleasure and if you do that long enough he can cum."

"What's cum?"

"It's semen. Not the people who are on boats. It's a body fluid that can fertilize a female's egg. But it has to be around ovulation time." Before she could ask he says, still totally embarrassed "that's about 2 weeks after your period."

"That's all I need to know. But um one more question."

"What is it?"

Alice grabbed a pillow off the bed and held it to her face for a minute. "What does a….. penis look like?"

"I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-if you w-want I-I can show y-you what I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-it looks like." Gil gulped hoping if she said she wanted to see he could actually show her.

"Really? That would be interesting." Alice said turning back to face Gil. Taking a deep breath Gil reached down to his pants and slid them down. And he stood there with, her staring at him, without pants.

"Is that what it looks like ALL the time?" Alice asked

"No. This is what it looks like when a guy is turned on. Normally its not as…big."

"*che* then just freaking show me what the hell a man a woman do when they have sex." Alice said getting tired of just standing there.

"Very well." Gil said kicking his shoes off and pulling his pants back up, so he wouldn't trip and kill himself. Slowly he grabbed her jacket and pushed it off her body. After he was done with that he took his own off and threw it to the ground. He reached for the clamps on her shirt. She helps him by sliding it off after it is unclamped. He stood admiring her breasts. Slowly his hand went to touch one and as his hand brushes against her he hears a small moan from her. She reached for his shirt and unbuttoned it seeing the large scar left by Oz. She leaned over and kissed it gently. Suddenly Gil's hands were on her skirt and he hurriedly pushed them down along with her panties. He pushed he back to lay on the bad as he took in the sight of her. "I'm going to warn you Alice, it's going to hurt when we get to the actual sex. But only this time." Gil says climbing onto the bed next to her. He captures her mouth with his and his hand travels down her body.

Slowly he found her clit and rubbed it. She moaned against his mouth and her hips moved against his hand. She reached for his pants trying to tug them off. Chuckling Gil stood and slid them off for her. Alice laid there staring at his body, taking in everything. Gil pushed her to the top of the bed and spread her legs with his hand. He settled himself on his knees between her legs. "This is going to hurt so you can bite me if you want." Gil said finding her opening. Alice nodded and placed her hands on his back.

"Go ahead Gil. Do it please." Alice said feeling the top of his dick against her opening.

Gil slowly pushed in and Alice cried out, nails digging in to his. Back. "God damn it seaweed head. It HURTS!" She cried as tears fell from her eyes.

"It's okay. The pleasure will make it go away. But only if you want me to keep going."

"Go get rid of this god damn pain!" And Gil started thrusting slowly letting her body get used to having him there. Her hips started to meet his thrust sometimes urging him to go faster. Finally Gil heard Alice moan his name and felt her orgasm against him. Gil was just reaching his climax when Oz, Sharon and Break walked in.

"RAVEN ! WHAT ARE YOU TWO DOING!" Sharon yelled.

"Um…." Gil mumbled, "Nothing.."

"Would you call.. Doing that…. To Alice chan is nothing?" Oz asked in a distressed voice. Then with a smirk Oz puleed a cat out and threw on the raven haired man.

"OH GOD NO!"

* * *

So what do you think?


End file.
